I typed this post with one hand

So I'm sitting here staring at a pile of laundry, a pile of dishes, and a pile of papers that I would love to try and conquer or at least shower for the day (yes I am aware it is 4 in the afternoon) but I'm holding a beautiful sleeping baby boy.  Why don't I just lay him down you ask?  Because two minutes ago I giggled because he smiled in his sleep and he woke up.  Sadly, this boy did not inherit my ability to sleep through the Apocalypse.  Also, when he wakes up and realizes he doesn't have a pacifier he is not very happy.  Zach's favorite game to play is cry, insert pacifier, fall asleep, spit out pacifier, wake up two minutes later and repeat.  Some of you might say, maybe he's hungry, well he's not.  He just nursed for an hour.  He just likes attention from his parents I guess.   Well, my hand is starting to cramp typing at an awkward angle.   But just know, I LOVE this kid!

Well Folks, Zachary went to the doctors yesterday.  He is 7 lbs 14 oz which is good considering he left the hospital at 6 lbs 8 oz but sad because it puts him in the 8% for weight, which means he's teeny!  When we attempted a scientific measurement of him using our home scale we thought he was 9 or 10 lbs.  We were obviously way off.  Also, this means that technically he could still be in newborns.  But size 1 diapers have past the blow out test and we're sticking with the less expensive size.  He's grown an inch and a 1/4 but he's still only in the 37% for length.  I know all these numbers mean nothing except to say if your baby is small, medium or large but I thought you all would like to know Zach has officially been classified as small. 

He also got a shot yesterday.  Did I almost break down in tears when his eyes flew open, his arms and legs stuck straight out and then I heard the most terrifying cry come out of my baby's mouth? Yes.  It's a good thing the nurse at least acted sympathetic, let me swoop him into my arms right away, and then left right after that otherwise I might have punched her for causing irreparable damage to my emotional psyche.  I have no idea how I'm going to sit through a bazillion more shots with him and future children down the road. 

Well since our life just got a whole lot more boring to read about, we will simple list what our life is like these days because although we LOVE being parents, trying to make being parents to a child that basically eats, sleeps, poops, and cries sound exciting is rather difficult. 

• We have digressed in our maturity to the point that farts and burps have become super funny
• We keep hoping he'll poop in second hour of our church meeting because the sounds are so funny and it would be totally inappropriate but would break up the time
• We find ourselves wandering around the baby section of any store and have to ask ourselves, "how did we get here?!"
• Leaving the house consists of changing Zach's clothes for the day, feeding him, having him fall asleep, change his diaper and then repeat.  We usually don't leave the house until it's too late to get anything done
• Clean? Is that even a word...
• Social gatherings are wasted if we don't show 3 pictures of Zach, tell 5 stories about him and basically monopolize the event completely around Zach
• We have watched more crappy movies and t.v. shows than one should do in a lifetime because there's not much one can do in way of entertainment when they have a newborn.  Yesterday we watched an episode of Inspector Gadget...enough said.
• Oh, and half an episode of Mario Brothers that we didn't finish only because Tommy had to go to class. How embarrassing.
• We celebrate when we get 4 hours of sleep

This list was brought to you by Chelsea and Tommy May

He Loves his hands! And I love his hair!

They are too cute together

Happy One Month!

 Hello World! My name is Zachary May.  I am official one month old and therefore old enough to take over my parents' blog to tell you a little bit about me. 

• I love to be snuggled and held
• I find it funny to pee on my mom when she's nursing me
• I've learned that if I cry, my parents respond
• I start growling if I get too sad
• I don't like church much.  I usually try to get my parents to go home early.  I'm good at distracting them at church as well.  They like to fight over who gets to hold me.  Mom wins out when I'm hungry
• I'm kind of a night owl.  I love the hours between 11:30 - 2 am  and then usually at 3:30 as well
• I usually try and save my bowel movements for one big one.  I'm kind of a hoarder in that way
• I don't understand the point of tummy time.
• I LOVE my hands.  I like holding them and using them to stroke my face and I pray a lot with them  One time I did it during the sacrament prayer and my parents pulled out their phones to take a picture before realizing how inappropriate that would be.  So there is no picture
• I am super cute and am now in size 1 diapers as of today.  This makes my parents very happy because newborn diapers are unnecessarily expensive.  You'd think because they use less material they'd be cheaper but no.

Zachary!

Yes Ladies and Gents, in case you haven't heard, Zachary Mike May was born December 17, 2011 at 2:50 pm.  He weighed 7 lbs 3 oz and was 20 1/4 inches long.  He is super duper adorable as you can see and wow has life changed since he joined our family.  I am incredibly impressed with those women who are able to post their birth stories and baby photos within days of giving birth.  I am obviously not one of those.  It's not that I am not overly excited it's more the fact that I have had zero time or energy and if/when I did have the time/energy, I wasn't about to waste it on my blog, I used it for more important things, like sleeping.

So here is a summary of Zach's birth story.  The week leading up to his birth, I knew I was going to have Zach that week.  How? Well, I kept coming across passages in the scriptures that talked about how if you ask for those things in which you stand in need of, the Lord will provide.  Well, I needed to have this baby this week.  I was so miserable and in tears practically every day that he didn't come.  Plus, Tommy was done with school, I was done with work, and my parents have never spent an anniversary apart.  My mom was down helping out and was my doula and this was going to be their first anniversary apart.  I couldn't do that to them.  So Zach needed to come ASAP.

Well I started having steady contractions on Friday afternoon.  After a while they never progressed so I called the doctor and he said that if the contractions persisted but stayed the same for 12 hours, that I should go to the hospital and get checked.  At my last appointment I was at 2 cm, 90% effaced and his head was engaged. In fact, the doctor said his head was already in the birth canal!  Unfortunately, 12 hours later meant 4:00 am.  So we all tried to get some sleep around 9 pm and I was of course up till past midnight from nerves.  At 3:30 we woke up and checked the contractions and they were still the same.  So we showered, ate breakfast and headed to the hospital.  They checked my blood pressure and it was pretty high.  I was so scared and stressed out by this point.  I've never been to a hospital before for myself and only once or twice for someone else so I'm not really fond of them.  But I was only at a 2 still.  They kept me for another hour to check my blood pressure again.  It was still high.  It really came down to the fact that I was so incredibly nervous!! Later on when contractions got worse, my blood pressure was actually lower! 

Lucky for me, my high blood pressure made the doctor decide to break my water and start me on petosin.  I started to feel a bit uncomfortable and asked for an epidural knowing I could handle the pain now but worried about what it would feel like in a half hour.  The nurse said the anesthesiologist was in surgery and would be done in about 45 minutes.  Then the crazy painful contractions picked up.  The only way I got through them was knowing it would all be over soon! Once I got my epidural, I was only at a 3. I napped for about 2 hours and by then I was at a 4 almost a 5.  I was feeling well enough to play a game of phase 10.  Neither my mom nor Tommy felt that the woman in labor deserved to win. About half way through I felt pretty tired and was sick of losing so I decided after one more hand I would take a nap. But then the nurse came in and checked me and said, "It's time to push! You're fully dialated!"  I wasn't ready for that news so soon!  It only took 10 pushes and Zach was out. 



So that's our story.  Not incredibly eventful but I didn't want it to be.  Also, I love epidurals.  I have all the respect in the world for women who can deliver babies without them but I definitely have no desire to try anytime soon.  More about our life later.  It's time to go back to being mommy!